Hope Moves Mountains

"There was a 1% chance of this complication" but it happened to me. I asked my doctor what are the chances of another complication? That I could go home from the hospital and move the wrong way and have another hematoma and bleeding? He said the chances are small but the chances were small that at 43 I would have been diagnosed with Stage 2 Invasive Ductal Carcinoma and there was a small chance the mass would be so large that they would have to take 4 inches of skin along with the tumor and not be able to put in an expander, thus making me walk around with only one boob for 7 months. Leading to a Lat flap surgery, and there was a small chance I would end up having to have my gallbladder out in the midst of it all. Going thru 4 rounds of chemo before that even.  So, what are the chances? Small, but they happened to me. September 9th, 2016  Surgery day. The out patient surgery to take out the expanders and put in the implants. It's simple and I would be home that night

Sitting here with a big drain sticking out of my side with a safety pin holding it to a Stella & Dot badge rope around my neck. I was supposed to be getting the drain out today but had to reschedule the appointment to Monday because the drain amount jumped up yesterday. It's supposed to be less than 30 ml for 2 days in a row before I can get the drain out and it was steady heading that direction until 2 days ago I wasn't thinking and grabbed Mandy (puppy) with my left hand and lifted her off the sofa and set her on the floor because she was trying to chew on anything that moved and that included my hand, shirt and even the drain tube if it got to close. I knew as soon as I didi it it was a mistake. I used muscles I wasn't supposed to be using. The next morning my drain volume was 22 and I knew it wasn't going to be a good day. The evening kept the chaos going with breaking up fights with Ava and Ashley to the point I had to physically wedge my self between them and

It's hard to believe it's been 7 months since I was diagnosed and at the same time I'm in the same place.,

I have been told I should be blogging my story. I'm going to start and hope it will make the experience I have had so far more real to me. It all happened so fast I almost feel like it is a dream I'm not waking up from. I am still surprised when I look in the mirror and see my super short post chemo hair and take extra time looking in the mirror at my scars like if I stare at them they will suddenly disappear. . I have more surgery to go but am thru the worst, I hope. -Tonya